You can’t underestimate the effect that one person can have on another person’s life - even if you don’t ever officially meet. And today, I was reminded of that.
I grew up in the rural South. My parents were smart, hardworking people. They wanted the “best” for me, but I don’t think any of us knew what that was supposed to be.
I had always planned on college but I didn’t know people who went to college. I just knew it was something I wanted to do.
My Grandfather Phillips did everything he could to discourage me from college. Women, he would say, should stay home. They have no business going to school. “They just want to be men,” he would say. And my aunt agreed.
And so, as a little girl, I didn’t have a whole lot of role models I could aspire to be like: Nancy Drew. Wonder Woman. One of Charlie’s Angels (well, Jaclyn Smith’s character and I did share a first name).
Mostly, I liked the jobs that “boys” did. I watched a lot of TV with my Granddaddy Joye and, relying on that, I had narrowed my career choices to two things: short stop for the Atlanta Braves or a lawyer (I watched a lot of Perry Mason reruns).
After an unfortunate incident involving my cat and my attempting to learn baseball, law, as a career, was looking better. I was much better suited to the law than to baseball anyway. I loved to read, write and argue. What more did you need?
Of course, about the most encouragement I received was from my great-grandmother, who used to joke that I talked more than a Philadelphia lawyer (little did she know that one day, I would become one).
But despite all the negativity, hearing that girls shouldn’t go to college, that they would never amount to anything, I kept dreaming. And so imagine what it felt like, as a little girl, to hear that a woman had been admitted to the Supreme Court of the United States.
I was almost 9 years old when Justice Sandra Day O’Connor was sworn in as the first female Supreme Court Justice. I watched the evening news on NBC and remember being blown away. Here was a woman chosen by the most powerful man in the world (or so I thought), President Ronald Reagan, to make important decisions about our country. She was way cooler than Perry Mason.
Through the years, I haven’t always agreed with Justice O’Connor on ideology but I have always thought that she was brilliant and fair. I aspired to be like her. After her appointment, I told my dad that one day I would be a lawyer.
More than 20 years later, I am a lawyer. Like Justice O’Connor, I have my own legal practice and I work hard. I, too, love my family and keep them close. I have always been struck by her ability to balance her job and her family life.
But the thing that I’m most struck by? How she made something so very extraordinary seem ordinary. And attainable. That impressed me as a little girl and it impresses me even more now that I’m a lawyer.
Justice O’Connor announced her retirement today. I will admit that it shocked me and made me a little sad. I understand and respect her decision, but wish it wasn’t happening just yet. She will be missed.
So, Justice O’Connor, here’s a big thanks from one of the little girls who watched as you paved the way for all of us women, not just in law but in life.
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